Polito: If you don't like the weather... - Boston News, Weather, Sports | FOX 25 | MyFoxBoston

Polito: If you don't like the weather...

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Here's a fun activity to pass the time while you're snowbound and watching FOX 25's excellent coverage of the blizzard (look for me live from Worcester).

Get a little paper pad and document every time you hear a friend or family member say, "I hate this weather, I'm moving South." Write down the time, date, and circumstances of the outburst. I guarantee you there's a .0001 percent chance that they will follow through. Then, one day next July, as they're complaining about the heat, you can rub it in their faces. The same way my older brothers would rub snow in my face. That hurts!

For instance, don't believe Joe when he assumes a stance resembling the hunchback of Notre Dame after dislocating his shoulder from too many fruitless starter pulls on his ancient snow blower. You should also probably turn away before you notice the massive clump of "whatever" that is frozen and crusted on his mustache.

Ed won't move either, even though the back of his pants hang too low and snow falling from the roof gave him a case of frozen plumber's crack. Those are not the cheeks that make you look healthy when they are rosy red.

And Mary won't do it even after she tried to drive through the plowed in end of the driveway and got stuck, the car teetering with wheels spinning like a turtle on its back. There's just something magical about the smell of freshly fallen snow when mixed with an overstressed transmission.

Once Joe's shoulder heals, he'll wrench it out of the socket again trying to start the lawnmower. The top of Ed's backside will turn ruby red from sunburn. And Mary will get stuck, this time from an overheated engine because she poured wiper fluid into the coolant reservoir.

The United States Census and other data support the anecdotal conclusion that people rarely move after a bad storm or a prolonged winter. There was no mass exodus out of Massachusetts following the heavy snowfall from two years ago. The decision to relocate is almost always the result of a new job, a retirement, a marriage, or some other major life event.

Bottom line: We're New Englanders and we've been complaining about the weather since November of 1620. I'm sure some Pilgrim groused about a cold rain or late fall chill as they stepped on Plymouth Rock.

Be prepared, be safe, look out for others, we'll get through this.

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